Sunday, April 5, 2009

i have my share of calluses, thank you (revised).

last ones undergone some changes. redacting, adding, switch it change it rearrange it and such.

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im goin where

people write songs

by fallin off the sides of skyscrapers

hands out and

lettin the wind whistle on

the tips of their fingers

where they hear

a hammond organ humming gospel hymns

and pedal point prayers

and Pollocks appear

on the gray street where they hit.

and i think most songs are about jesus.

 

im goin where

people watch earthquakes from the inside out

in red plush theatre seats

and previews of movies that never show

at least not here in this backwoods town

“Final Judgement 3”

coming out Nigh whenever that is,

heard it got bad reviews

“No thanks Nostradamus!”

they say sippin more soda than they should

and danglin twizzlers

spinnin like twisters

where there is sugar inside every storm.

 

im goin where

they keep the imagination in a toolbox

with hope and a tape measure and screwdriver

and every doodle they every doodled in the fifth grade.

tell phillip to tell allen they can keep their own head

theyll need em

and you have your own.

where people build buildings on a page

and the homeless draw themselves houses

with a couple crayons on a napkin

and it comes to be

and you can draw anything at all that

you can at least sorta outline

so long as you have the common sense

to color outside the lines

where the gold

in your family crest

really shines.

even castles fit on page.

 

im goin where

people aren’t people but

guitar strings tuned by God.

nickel-wound

pulled taut

they know that

soon as they think they may snap

they resonate.

there is sound.

they sing under stress.

 

im goin where

every church is a barn

you vaguely know from your childhood

and coming back

is a sacrament.

it was your granpa’s.

said it’s red with his own blood and sweat.

“us old timers dont build with our head, we use our hands”.

got calluses on his fingers on rusty strings

on a bent guitar in the feed room

feeding us an old sermon.

there’s only one he knows.

singing about jesus in his heart.

and in the silo

all his kids and kids’ kids play

leaping down into the hay

and tossing up the straw

and they call that “baptism”

as long as you laugh loud enough.

 

im goin where

people catch fire but don’t burn up.

they catch fire and hold it

and sometimes toss it around

and call each other flamethrowers.

where St. Augustine goes knocking

door to door

with an old baseball mit

asking anyone, anyone at all for a game of catch

when he thinks his heart’s all burnt out.

he still smokes cant kick the habit

but not in the way you think,

tends a flame inside his ribs

and blows out the fumes in the shape of a cross.

if youre not up for catch

or forgot your mit or matches

or youd rather not play with fire,

pour poor Augustine some coffee.

he says one cup will do.

it’s freezing outside

he just wants to feel warm.

 

im goin where

blind lemon jefferson aint so blind.

he learned to see by strumming with his thumb

and uses his guitar pick like a third eye.

he too sings about jesus

and goes by deacon bates.

 

im goin where

a barbed-wire fence is not a fence

its the tail of a great dragon

that towers over us all

filling her lungs with air

ready to sigh out

and the people run for their lives

and Augustine stands and waits

arms out eyes open ready

he just wants to feel warm.

 

im going where

they steal the steering wheels from cars

and take them

everywhere so they feel

like theyre going somewhere always

like theyre moving

even when theyre not.

in fact theyre happy standin

in place

most hours of the day.

and in the night they dance.

 

im going where doctors prescribe two hours

of shutting your eyes as hard as you fucking can

twice a day,

so you at last see that darkness for what it is -

a canvas

and every sob is a scene

and we all cry paint.

where a boy born blind sing whole chords at a time

holdin’ C add 9 for days that rhymes

with all that orange in the sky

where God peels the sun with a knife he calls Son

squeezes out love for you to drink the Dawn.

drink up.

you’ll need vitamins W E A R E A L L L O V E and D to make it through act five-hundred.

all the stage is a world

we built our own sunset and sewed our costumes called skin

we stand on solar flares stage left

this show’s Sol’d out and after tonight we’ll be stars

dark falls like a curtain and the boy walks home singing

still holding his notes and stretching them out for Miles

Round Midnight he rolls his music out like

tape measure to find how far he can scream

when he screams out the dark we call night up into the sky

and he laughs,

he knows this ribbon won’t reach, not even to the Moon

where craters resonate with old radio waves of old radio shows

that he hears in bed

his favorite, The Adventures of Superman,

tonight’s episode, “Lois Lane Goes Missing”

and listens like a Superman

he shoots laser beams from his eyes that people mistake for shooting stars

and calls that seeing

and says we should get our own eyes checked,

his work fine.

 

where people steal the dustcovers off turntables

and keep them on their heads and on their hearts

and when they lift them up

they are children again.

where people play old records

inside their chests and hear

heartbeat melodies over

decibels of dissonance of discharging rifles and dishwashers,

and glasses shattering in the heat inside

and people carry the shards in their skin

and love them.

in fact they show them like badges of honor

and keep dust on their ribs and its ok.

We all keep decks inside our chests

it's just that some of us forgot it's there but it is.

Some us forgot love isn't a diamond stone you hold so let go,

it's a sound you hear so listen.

Some of us forgot our hearts aren't set in place, they spin sometimes

if you play the right songs.

Let the vinyl scratch awhile and I will too, I swear.

I too hear my heart ticking like the little hand of a watch sometimes

and I can't believe this thing still works

but it does.

 

come mornin im good as gone.

im goin home.

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